Re: I resigned in 2004
- Date: Thu, 6 Dec 2018 16:48:56 +0100
- From: Rhonda D'Vine <rhonda@xxxxxx>
- Subject: Re: I resigned in 2004
* Mattia Rizzolo <mattia@xxxxxxxxxx> [2018-11-12 12:32:17 CET]:
> On Sun, Nov 11, 2018 at 02:56:14PM -0500, Chris Lamb wrote:
> > I would be surprised if there were no topics or issues for you
> > (including outside of the free software world) where reacting in a
> > ungentlemanly manner is likely given some history or context.
> I naturally had my own cases of "ungentlemanly behaviour", but I don't
> think I would be that easy to trigger. This may be arrogant of me, but
> as a personal policy I try to always "keep my cool"—even if it did cause
> me sudden lashes when I've been angered (luckily rare…).
Thing is, just because something is written in a polite way doesn't
mean it can't be hurtful, and just because something comes across
brusquely doesn't mean it might not be justified. And willy was
extremely clear on not wanting a response, and yet you chose to respond
to it. So willy's anger towards that is very much justified, and
discussing about that tone is putting the focus on the wrong end here.
Expecting mistreated people to interact constructively about their
mistreatment is a tool of oppression and privilege, which you show in
your other mail:
> Erm. Again, if one can't deal with such emails, you should really
> seek help and support elsewhere, IMHO.
That reads a bit like you intentionally ignored the request to not be
contacted again, or simply didn't care, and try to justify with this.
Which is what what I think Chris refers to as victim blaming, that is,
putting the emphasis for the reaction towards your mistreatment on
willy, which you make it read like you don't see anything wrong with,
which is really not cool.
Please think of your own actions and don't ask others to seek help with
what you have attributed to.
Fruits for thoughs,
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